This is a question that is asked over and over again. "How are you?" is often used in tandem with a greeting when we see someone we know. Sometimes it is said as a habit, and other times in the truest of sincerity.
A simple question, but I have come to believe that this is one of the hardest questions to answer.
Most often the reply to this question is a one word answer such as "Fine." So simple and we move on in conversing with each other, or by parting ways. But more and more often I am finding myself overwhelmed when I am asked this simple question of "How are you?"
How can I explain to someone in a few minutes, let alone one word, what is going on with me in my life and heart? I CAN'T!!!
I have so much going on in my life. Things that are agonizing, wonderful, normal, perplexing, and so on. Things that leave me feeling happy, frustrated, anxious, loved, angry, blessed, and much more.
So each time I am asked, "How are you?" I have all of these thoughts and feelings that I have experienced recently come to mind. At times it can be almost crushing in it's intensity. And because of the feeling of being overwhelmed by trying to explain how I am, I simply reply, "Fine."
To me it feels like this question is incomplete. "How am I…what?" I think it would be better if "How are you….?" was finished with something like "…thinking you did on the test?" "…going to get to school?" "…feeling about the diagnosis?" "…going to get the house cleaned while caring for your daughter at her doctors appointments all day?"
Completing the question lets us delve deeper into what is going on in a persons life, and how they are feeling about it. Completing the question means we need to listen and learn about this person we are talking to, so that we can continue to ask complete questions. Completing the question can strengthen relationships of friendship and love.
Completing the question is harder. It is so much easier to leave the question unfinished. I do it all the time, and have been for many years. But I hope to change that. In time.
